COMICS READ:

JAN. 84

FEB. 118

MAR. 53

APR. 30

MAY 93

JUN. 66

JUL. 64

AUG. 92

SEP. 79

OCT. 62

NOV. 24

DEC. 42

Total comics and GNs read in 2013: 807

FIVE-STAR beauties were hard to find this year. But I found a few memorable titles to look back on. Here’s the list (with my original comments):

-originally published in Transmetropolitan #1-60, Transmetropolitan: I Hate It Here, Transmetropolitan: Filth Of The City& amp; various short stories (Vertigo, 1997-2002)

Writer: Warren Ellis/Artists: Darick Robertson & friends

Writer/artist: Cameron Stewart

The nice people at Dark Horse send me PDFs and links to where I can download their wonderful graphic novels and comics. In return, I shall plug them on my blog athttp://jackkingkirby.blogspot.com.au/2013/10/review-sin-titulo-by-cameron-stewart.html.

Locke& amp; Key Vol. 4&5 (IDW, 2012-13) *****

Writer: Joe Hill/Artist Gabriel Rodriguez

Writer/artist: Adrian Tomine

Overpriced and published far too rarely, but this is easily the most beautiful, haunting comic I’ve read this year.

Writer: Jason Ciaramella/Artist: Zach Howard

Based on the short story by Joe Hill, this yarn about a slacker son turned psychotic killer supervillain by a childhood “blankie” is suitably disturbing, violent and creepy. A perfect horror tale.

Freaked the fuck out by Junji Ito. Find out why atjackkingkirby.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/review-museum-of-terror-vol-3-by-junji.html

Writers/artists: various

I don’t usually get so enthused about anthology specials (even though I buy them all the time), but this comic is a gem from start to finish. Sure, not every yarn is a goal, but every tale is thought-provoking and several are pure gems. A star-studded cast of creators including Matt Kindt, Jeff Lemire, Gail Simone, Simon Spurrier and Dan Abnett easily make this my favourite comic so far for the year.

Writer: Phillip Nowlan/Artist: Richard Calkins

Some fantastic full-colour reprints, an overview on the Buck Rogers phenomenon of the 20s and 30s, plus some nice pics of Buck Rogers memorabilia. What more could you ask for in a free comic?

Writer/artist: Hal Foster

Just gorgeous, classic Sunday funnies artwork – and the stories weren’t half-bad either.

Adult comics doesn’t have to mean bare boobs and bums. Sometimes a mature title can be a perverse, dread-filled horror yarn like this classic manga. This is the concluding volume detailing a spiral curse that descends on a Japanese village, eventually destroying everyone caught in its evil web. Humans metamorphosing into snails (and worse), cannibalism, murder, insanity and worse are on display, making so-called modern horror yarns like all those Crossed sequels look piss-weak by comparison. Nothing is more disturbing, yet compelling, as Uzumaki.

THERE were a few shockers in 2013, but the biggest shock came with Vertigo’s The Exterminators. This was a rare instance when I started out really liking a title but by the end I really hated it, mainly ’cos the climax was weak and rushed, and totally destroyed every good thing that had come before it. There was a massive drop in quality over the final 12 issues, which left a really sour taste in my mouth. Still, it didn’t quite make my shit list, but here are the few that did...

Writer/artist: unknown

A horrible TV tie-in series that makes me want to smash my head repeatedly on a teevee set. Perfunctory plotting, dull art and a nasty edge of misogyny winding its way through the entire odious issue. I can’t even bring myself to keep this comic for camp purposes.

Writers/artists: various

If there was ever an example of everything that could go wrong with a licensed comic, then this is it. I bought the first 12 issues of this awful series (it limped on to #17 before being mercifully axed), but I’ve only finally got around to reading it. Clearly, my sixth sense was telling me something three years ago. This updating of the Doc Savage mythology fails on every level. The first four issues is poorly written by supposed modern pulp writer Paul Malmont, positioning Savage and his crew as victims fleeing the US after being framed by a sinister cabal for crimes they didn’t commit. Malmont is a terrible writer, but he’s not helped by Howard Porter, one of the most inept artists ever to be given a major title to work on. Porter’s so shit he can’t even draw hats properly. Seriously, a five-year-old could draw a hat better than this dipstick. Issue five is a standalone yarn set in Greece. Writer B. Clay Moore is better than Malmont, but that’s faint praise. Porter’s art actually gets WORSE in this issue. Doc Savage was floundering by this stage, which is why “First Wave” creator Brian Azzarello came aboard with #6. Co-writing with Ivan Brandon, they craft a promising yarn where Savage and his team (who remain woefully underwritten for the entire 12 issues) are given the opportunity by the US military to be pardoned for their crimes if they go into the Middle East to track down some WMDs and an old friend, long thought dead. As Azzarello has never explained the “First Wave”world to readers, we have to work out for ourselves that much of the Middle East is a fiery atomic wasteland after “the last war”. Anyway, Nic Klein’s art is a vast improvement on Porter’s retarded scribbles (he can draw hats on men’s heads for starters). But the story soon falls apart again and makes little sense by the end of the arc. Savage has also morphed under Azzarello’s writing from a guy who is stronger and smarter than the average person due to decades of rigorous training to a substitute Superman whose capabilities border on the ludicrous. In the end, Savage shows that even death is only a minor inconvenience. Klein’s art becomes more disjointed as the issues progress –action scenes are hard to follow and at other times it’s left to the reader to fill in the gaps on what really happened in a scene. I felt like my head was gonna explode by #12 and it was a blessed relief when I realised I didn’t have to read another fucking issue. This series is definitely not a keeper, even if JG Jones’ covers are beautiful. The first nine issues also have a back-up feature, Justice Inc. (writer: Jason Starr/artist: Scott Hampton). It’s kinda brutal in a Steve Ditko-kinda way, and far more entertaining than the main feature.

Writer: Eric M. Esquivel/Artist: Ander Sarabia

A reimagining of public domain superhero Black Terror sees him turned into an Afro-American urban vigilante. A promising idea, but Esquivel is too busy ranting and raving about black politics to make anyone – particularly your average comic book reader – care about the character. Weirdly, he focuses much of his contempt and hatred towards “Uncle Tom” weatherman Al Roker. Sarabia’s art shows cartoony promise, but this angry tale is way too preachy for my tastes. Take a chill pill, Eric.

Writer: Brian Azzarello/Artists: Tony Akins (interior); Simon Bisley (cover)

Review can be found online atjackkingkirby.blogspot.com.au/2013/07/quick-review-red-dragon-1-comico-1996.html.

Writers/artists: various

Even a cool cover plus various strips by good friend Mister J can rescue this Aussie comic. It’s the utter shits.

Writer/artist: Mark Marderosian

I bought this cheap due to the cheesecake cover. D’oh. Really pedestrian “sexy cop” yarn, mired in mawkish soap opera shenanigans of the worst kind. Pretty amateurish on every level. Damn you, brief B&W comic book boom, you gave us so much shit back then!

-originally published in B-Movie Comix#1-3 (Whizz-bin Comix, 1994)

Writer/artist: Eric Wald

Gary Groth and Kim Thompson, you are such hypocrites. You simultaneously published the elitist, highbrow The Comics Journal– that regularly slagged off mainstream comics – while putting out hard-core porn under your “Eros Comix” banner. Shame on you. Now, some Eros stuff was fine, but much of it was rubbish – like this graphic novel (which, thankfully, I didn’t have to pay for as it was given to me for free). Allegedly, the original three-issue series got destroyed by flood and only six copies remain. So the series was collected in one TPB and what readers got was hard-core filth, a confusing storyline and interchangeable, forgettable characters. I couldn’t follow what was going on and Wald’s cartoony art made the porn sections underwhelming. Unerotic erotica? Blegh.

Political satire only works if people remember what the fuck was being satirised. English politics 40 years down the track means fuck-all to me. Certain political figures featured in this hardback collection of strips are familiar to me – PMs Edward Heath andHarold Wilson, Tory MPs such as Sir Alec Douglas-Home and the future Iron Lady Margaret Thatcher, US Prez Richard Nixon and Vice-Prez Spiro Agnew and Rhodesian PM Ian Smith. Actually, that’s not too shabby – but I’m sure most other people picking up this book would struggle with half the faces, most of the names and ALL the issues of the day. Which makes it a real chore to read this strip that appeared regularly in the otherwise conservative The Guardian newspaper. Varoomshka herself is a gorgeous-but-naive observer of the political machinations going on around her, usually while half-dressed. It’s well-drawn but time has not been kind to this collection.

Emma from NXT

ONCE again, it's time for AUSTRALIA'S BIGGEST AND MOST SUCCESSFUL PODCAST to delight its millions and MULLLLLLLLIONS of fans. Australia's most beloved pornographer DANN LENNARD is joined by Australia's most dangerous man LORD MARK WILLIAMSON - NOT on Australia Day - to record the most important podcast of the year......

It's a solid 50 minutes of subjective comments, witty banter from his Lordship and the usual shitkent talk from me. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll be astounded who made our top 20 and who DIDN'T. Below is the full Top 200. Check it out while you're listening to the podcast. Did we miss anyone? Let us know.

And don't forget our bloody scotch, Ethan Hughz!

Adam "Brooksy" Brooks appears stunned after learning

who's been named WWCBD 2013 Wrestler of the Year!

QUALITY always trumps quantity. With that in mind, here's another of our semi-regular podcasts, this time coinciding with both Australia Day AND Dave Meltzer's Wrestling Observer awards.

Naturally, this proves to an opportune time to present the WWCBD Annual Australian Wrestling Awards for 2013.

This year, the categories include: WRESTLER OF THE YEAR, BEST PROMOTION, BEST MATCH, BEST MANAGER, BEST FEUD, WORST FEUD (you'll be surprised who I single out for attention), MOST IMPROVED, BEST PODCAST (it wasn't BAM - but they DO get their very own award for WORST BAM SEGMENT OF 2013) and...............our most highly anticipated and controversial award, SHIT KENT OF THE YEAR.

Get the lawsuits ready after you download 90+ minutes of cackling mayhem. Can your hearts stand it, scenesters....whoops, sorry Dubbs......Aussie wrestling? :P

Orlando is overjoyed to hear about the noms for SHIT KENT OF THE YEAR

IN WHICH I focus on two great comic artists of the past - Bernard Krigstein and Alex Toth - while reviewing the excellent Fantagraphics books, Messages In A Bottle: Comic Book Stories by B. Krigstein (2013) and Setting The Standard: Comics By Alex Toth 1952-1954 (2011).

Enjoy 17min & 25sec of hoarse comic book chat.

A FINAL podcast for the year as I review the AWF "spectacular" on Saturday night, held at the "Windsor Wrestling Arena" (aka, a cinderblock shed in an industrial estate on the arse end of Sydney, conveniently located next to a Comancheros bikie clubhouse).

I wonder what Ring Of Honor star MICHAEL ELGIN made of this shithole (and the 50-odd fans who turned up both nights) to watch what was - to be fair - good shows. I only caught the second one, but I enjoyed every match...although I enjoyed the women's three-way title match for DIFFERENT reasons.

Anyway, it's 16 minutes of non-stop chatter from me in a car driving back from fucking Windsor. Hear me lightheartedly diss Mark Davis (who wasn't even on the bloody show), Michael Elgin (shhh...don't tell him) and Bruuuuuuuce (a big rookie who shows promise).

And, of course, there's the usual hardcore burial of such deserving targets as ex-PWAQ supremo and all-round fuckwit AV Dangerously (the Billy Wolfe of Aussie women's wrestling), "La Panda" (the woman with no entrance music...and no in-ring talent), Shane Saw and that utter cunt CB Cochrane. Seriously...fuck you, Cochrane.

LOTSA trade paperback talk this time round in this 45-mnute extravaganza.

Plus I rave about Basement Books in Sydney and give a potted review of KICK-ASS 2. Enjoy. ;)

PWWA in Parramatta on August 3...thoughts on the KrackerJak vs Lord Mark Williamson bout at WarZone 17...interviews galore...and SAUSAGES! Let's rock!
32+ minutes of live drunken mayhem and a cooking challenge to one Adam Gambino! :O

WELCOME to a very special podcast taped following last Saturday's great PWA card at The Roxy in Parramatta. I kick things off by chatting with Melbourne sensation Adam Brooks on his thoughts on NAW flogs disrespecting the business, before discussing his recent tryout in the US with Ring Of Honor. Next, I catch up with Melbourne's Mr Juicy (above) where we attempt to talk about everything BUT wrestling. Porn, amateur nude models, penis size and cheap Viagra substitutes are the topic of the day. As you can imagine, it's a complete disgrace. I end the near-25-minute podcast by catching up with ex-Queensland grappler Mark Davis. He gives his thoughts on the state of Queensland wrestling (not goodt), the size of his penis (goodt) and what's on AV Dangerously's laptop (mindboggling). All in all, this is my best, most controversial podcast EVER!!!!
You can find it HERE, so enjoy!

AND yet I spend the first 10 minutes talking about books. Get through that and you'll get to hear me review Warren Ellis's newuniversal reimagining and Howard Chaykin's first attempt at an "adult" book with American Flagg.

All in all, it's 28:30 of podcasting goodness (promise!).

WHAT WOULD CHRIS BENOIT DO?

TOP 200 WRESTLERS IN AUSTRALIA for 2013

QUICK NOTE: If you didn’t make this list, it’s for one of four reasons:

a) You’ve left the business (which is why we haven’t included the likes of Bobby Marshall, Sean O’Shea, Mikey Broderick, Ahmed Iblis, MH Cydell and Justin Greye)

b) We forgot you (sorry)

c) You work for a group that’s so below the radar we didn’t realise you existed (sorry), OR

d) You’re really, really SHIT.

Before we get started, me and Lord Mark Williamson discuss the top 20 (and the bottom five) in this 32-minute podcast. Enjoy......and let the controversy and bitching begin! :)

1. Emma (NXT) – wrestles more than anyone else, looks phenomenal. One step away from being in WWE Diva matches.

2. Mike Petersen (Warzone/MCW) – champion in two of the top promotions in Australia. Great look, great wrestler.

3. Krackerjak (Warzone/MCW/AWF/NHPW, etc etc)– great worker. Highly respected by his peers. Booked by many top promotions.

4. Mickey Nicholls (NOAH/EPW) – top worker, rising in the Jap ranks.

5. Shane Haste (NOAH/EPW) – ditto.

6. Matt Silva (MCW) – good wrester, great look. About to go to NXT. Social retard.

7. Jag (Zero-1 Adelaide) – top worker, great trainer, champion hot dog devourer.

8. Tama Williams (PWA Sydney/Newcastle Pro/NHPW/AWE) – great worker, intense, always wanting to improve.

9. Rob Matrix (UWA/IWA) – respected veteran, great worker. Still goes with the best of them.

10. Damien Slater (Zero-1) – good wrestler, becoming a great worker.

11. Tyson Gibbs (IWA/UWA) – great worker, mean look, natural heel.

12. Mark Davis (AWA Qld) – good worker. Big guy. Total dick (but we luvs ya, mate!)

13. Mimic (RCW) – lost the dreadies, gained charisma to go along with his good work.

14. J-Rock (EPW) – great worker, getting international praise.

15. Elliot Sexton (EPW/MCW) – great worker, funny guy. Master of the dick punch.

16. Iron Ben Coles (AWF) – good worker, marketing genius. You think fish fingers, you think Ben Coles!

17. Matt Bailey (PWA Sydney) – big guy, talented and versatile worker.

18. Daniel Swagger (PCW) – good worker, very popular with PCW fans.

19. Enforcer (Warzone/PCW) – underrated veteran who’s highly regarded by everyone he works with.

20. Ethan Hughz (IWA/CWA) – bribed us with a $7 bottle of rum. Would be higher if he gave us something more expensive that WASN’T rum.

21. Robbie Eagles (PWA Sydney) – would be ranked higher if he was taller.

22. Ryan Rollins (AAA Mexico/Warzone)

23. Lord Mark Williamson (Warzone) – NOTE FROM DANN: “I was not repeatedly hit in the face with an empty bottle of scotch to put Lord Mark Williamson in at this position. I make this statement of my own free will and not under any duress whatsoever...............please stop hitting me. And, now, over to His Lordship: “I am the greatest and most successful manager in Australian history. I was also able to perform a miracle in having a very entertaining match with Johnny Dee in SWA last year. BWAH-hahahahahahahahahahahaha!”

24. Ryan Eagles (PWA Sydney) – good worker, great trainer. Best beard in Australian wrestling.

25. Mick Moretti (PWA Sydney)

26. Robby Heart (Zero-1)

27. Rocky Menero (Zero-1)

28. Mason Childs (Grindhouse, Qld)

29. AJ Istria (AWA Qld)

30. Mike Burr (MCW)

31.Jay Andrews (MCW)

32. Bishop Sommers (PWA Sydney)

33. Carlo Cannon (MCW)

34. Adam Brooks (MCW)

35. Josh Shooter (MCW/PWA Sydney)

36. Jessie McKay (PWWA/SHIMMER)

37. Dowie James (MCW) – great worker...for a guy. But not as good as female wrestlers like Jessie. Sad but true, Dowie.

38. Kijimuna (Japan)

39. Chris Vice (NHPW)

40. Salem (UWA)

41. Bruce‘Havok’ Mills (Zero-1)

42. Mad Dog McCrea (Warzone)

43. Dan Damage (IWA) – smartest dressed man in Aussie wrestling.

44. Adam Hoffman (PWA Sydney/Newcastle Pro) – like Jack Bonza, only smaller.

45. Jack Bonza (PWA Sydney/Newcastle Pro) – like Adam Hoffman, only bigger.

46. Slex (MCW)

47. Andy“Voodoo” Roy (RCW)

48. GD Grimm (RCW)

49. Blakestone (AWF)

50. Spaceboy Dacey (AWF)

51. Dean Draven (AWF)

52. Mad Turk Hussein (AWF/WrestleRock)

53. Mr Juicy (MCW/PWA Sydney)

54. TNT (AWF)

55. Samoan Warrior (PWA Sydney/NHPW)

56. Krofty (NOW)

57. Hayden Zenith (NHPW/EPW)

58. Kellie Skater (PWWA/SHIMMER)

59. Madison Eagles (PWWA) – former SHIMMER champion has bounced back from serious injury this year.

60. Marcius Pitt (EPW)

61. Kiel Steria (EPW)

62. Jade Diamond (AWA Qld)

63. Jimmy Payne (EPW)

64. Kyote (NHPW)

65. Gorgeous Garry Schmidt (EPW)

66. Bruiser Barry Schmidt (EPW)

67. Davis Storm (EPW) – EPW original still pulls on the boots occasionally.

68. Mikey Lord (CWA)

69. “Pitbull”Craig Cole (Warzone)

70. Shazza McKenzie (PWWA/SHIMMER)

71. Sean Kustom (PWA Sydney)

72. JT Jay Taylor (EPW/NHPW)

73. Danny Psycho (MCW)

74. AZ Vergara (EPW/NHPW)

75. Concrete Davidson (PWA Sydney/Newcastle Pro) – best gimmick in Oz.

76. Kellyanne English (AAA Mexico/Warzone)

77. Bee Boy (PWA Sydney) – second-best gimmick in Oz.

78. Tre (Warzone)

79. Cletus (MCW/Warzone)

80. Jack O’Lantern (MCW/Warzone)

81. Ryan O’Hare (NAW)

82. Vixsin (Warzone/PCW)

83. Alberto Bravo (Warzone)

84. Sway (Warzone/RCW/NHPW)

85.“The Maniac” Wayne Mattei (Warzone)

86.“Birdman” Phil Picasso (IWA)

87. Chris Trance (Warzone)

88. Warship (EPW)

89. Jim Raze (Warzone)

90. Savannah Summers (RCW)

91. Brian Seeker (PWA Sydney)

92. Rainbro (PWA Sydney)

93. Luke Knight (AWE/IWA)

94. Mr Exclusive (AWE/IWA)

95. JT Robinson (PWA/AWE) – A 45-year veteran of the scene. Only the best get made AWE tag team champions.

96. John E. Radic (Snakepit)

97. Greg Graham (Zero-1)

98. Joey Graham (Zero-1)

99. Adam Asixx (CWA)

100. Michelle K. Hasluck (EPW/PWWA)

101. Jaguar Kid (NOW/PWA Sydney)

102. Jak Arkham (NOW)
103. Powerhouse Theo (AWF)

104. Falco (AWF)

105. Jay Law (AWF)

106. Massive Q (AWF)

107. The Illusionist (AWF/PWA Sydney)

108. Dan Steel (NHPW)

109. KC Cassidy (PWWA)

110. Jarrad Slate (NHPW)

111. Heritor (NHPW)

112. “Wreckin Ball” Wilson (Zero-1)

113. “Dirty”Dick Donovan (Zero-1)

114. Miami (RCW)

115. Lou Lou Lockhart (RCW)

116.“The Don” Michael Morleone (NHPW)

117. Rob Barnes (Newcastle Pro)

118. Pat Graham (Zero-1)

119. Tony“The Thug” Slater (CWA)

120. Sara Jay (MCW/GWE)

121. Harley Wonderland (AWE)

122. Rhys Youngblood (NHPW)

123. Richter (EPW)

124. Jamie Jurah (EPW)

125. Gavin“Shooter” McGavin (EPW)

126. Twitch (EPW)

127. Hughsey (EPW)

128. Scotty Ryan (EPW)

129. Leo Pratt (EPW)

130. Johnny Wimbledon (EPW)

131. Sebastian Sander (EPW)

132. Alex Kingston (EPW)

133. Adam Banks (EPW)

134. Azazel (EPW)

135. Mike Massive (EPW)

136. DJ Fusion (AWF)

137. Brad Smyth (RCW)

138. Marvel (RCW)

139. Del Taurino (RCW)

140. Hammer (RCW)

141. Big Brodie Marshall (RCW)

142. Nick Armstrong (RCW)

143. Jagger Stevens (NHPW)

144. Skyfire (NHPW)

145. Matthew Pace (NHPW)

146. Silvaback Mark Santoro (NHPW) – NOT Matt Silva, apparently.

147. Dorian (NHPW)

148. Det. Magnum Holmes (AWF)

149. Gladiator Apollo (AWF)

150. Jack Tasman (AWF)

151. “Greatness”Grant Linstrom (AWF)

152. Anubis (AWF)

153. Diego Del Fuego (AWF)

154. Rachel Rose (AWF)

155. Mighty Mel (AWF)

156. Luke Hunter (UWA)

157. Fury (AWE)

158. Jackie Wyld (AWE)

159. Big Bad Nick (AWE) – because of his hot missus.

160. Alex Lee (Japan)

161. Blade Matthews (NOW) – also an MMA warrior.

162. Iron Horse Morrison (NAW)

163. Morphine (NAW)

164. Alexi Papadopoulos (NAW)

165. Barry Laurence (NAW)

166. Jarek Craven (NAW)

167. Joel Bateman (NAW)

168. Mike Manson (NAW)

169. Slikk Steve (NAW)

170. Steve Valek (NAW)

171. El Tecniko (PCW)

172. Aaron Edwards (PCW)

173. Cody Swift (PCW)

174. Gabriel Wolfe (PCW)

175. Jay Webster (PCW)

176. Mark Kage (PCW)

177. Maverick Menace (PCW)

178. Micky Jackson (PCW)

179. Mr Big (PCW)

180. Randal (CWA)

181. The Wraith (SHWA)

182. Pain (SHWA)

183. George “The Hitman” Julio (NAW) – legendary trainer who still pulls on the boots occasionally to met out justice.

184. Storm (GWE)

185. Sammy Ozerkan (PCW)

186. Ricky Diamond (Melbourne scene)

187. Siren Monroe (MCW)

188. Marko Mitra (Melbourne scene)
189.Niki Nitro (CWA)

190. Cremator (MCW) – he threatened to kill me if I didn’t put him on this list.

191. Steve Frost (MCW) – he would’ve joined in.

192. Logan (MCW) – he would probably would’ve cackled and watched.

193. Chris Trio (PCW)

194. Kabel (NHPW)

195. Big T (AWE)

196. Shanesaw (AWF)

197. Traffic (AWF)
198. Kandi Luv (CWA/GWE)

199. Maso (CWA)

200. Psykotic (AWE)

Psykotic is all about da' money...and his expensive boots.